I’ve been too overwhelmed with it all to write, thinking it’s already been said, or it doesn’t matter, or that I just don’t have the words. The questions seem to abound.
Re: COVID19- What is really true? What is really known and what is still being understood. What’s politically motivated or self serving? What is freedom? Where do personal freedom and compassion intersect? Isn’t living in fear worse the getting the virus?
Re: Black Lives Matter- Somethings were too painful to watch the first time, do I really want to talk about it again? What can you say that isn’t more dividing? How can you stop generalizing to everyone in a perceived group? Do people really want to understand “racism,” systemic bias, our history?
And what about the creative process? I’ve been asked, “Isn’t focusing on all the violence, discrimination, white superiority etc., just giving more energy to what you don’t want?
So this may be the first of a series as I sort through my answers, letting the feelings flow over me and the thoughts swirl.
I’ve come to realize and value letting myself feel the feelings as opposed to pushing them down. This has been, and is, a major part of moving through this complicated time; breathing through the feelings, not getting lost in them. And being overwhelmed at times seems like it is part of being human….and, I’m realizing, that includes me.
I also know that I can choose to live in heaven or hell right now. When I choose to see the possibilities, the genuine care of many, and when I trust that love is stronger than hate and fear, I live in heaven.
And finally, I believe these times are sacred and we are being given an opportunity to sift through what is happening, work together in ways we may never have before and arrive at a place we haven’t yet imagined.
I hope you’ll stay tuned. I know I will. LOL!
Several weeks ago, when I asked the Lord what this is all about, I clearly heard the following from within: “To bring people together.” I feel overwhelmed by it all; yet, I firmly believe we are experiencing what I call the birth of our democracy. It is most painful and it is fraught with uncertainty.
Every life matters. What seems to be dawning is the fact that with freedom/rights come responsibilities. One without the other is anarchy vs. slavery. As this chaos foments, I pray for the consciousness of many people to awaken and enlighten. It has felt as if most people have been sleepwalking most of my life, couldn’t hear the truth or see it or speak it.
My life matters and my purpose remains to be present in the moment and do what makes sense, what is loving to both me and the other. The pain I see on the
TV has been there all along in movies and poetry, in children’s eyes and wives and husbands and within my own heart.
I am finding solace in the feelings I have from experiencing the eclipse Autumn 21, 2017 and knowing the perfect order of our universe. I am trusting the unfolding of what this is and aiming to keep an open heart so I can love well and have courage to speak/live my truth. What must I hold in compassion and what must I let go in order to have peace?